Dear Child: Michael & Gabriel

Dear Michael & Gabriel,

It feels like both a moment and a lifetime ago from that day.

The day we met.

I carried both of you for nine months, wondering who you would be and falling more in love with you as each day passed. I felt each little kick and how you connected with me in your own way.

Our dreams were crushed the day we lost you suddenly, but I know you were both a part of saving my life. You continue to save me in ways I could have never imagined.

You made me a butterfly.

Even though your story ended differently than we planned for, our love for both of you is brighter and bigger than ever. We feel you everywhere, in the birds singing, the sunshine on our faces, the Christmas lights, the way your sister builds castles and plays at the beach, each holiday that moves past us seemingly without you here. But we know you are here.

We see every sign.

Your dad and big sister love you so much. Even though we all miss you, we know that we will see you again, and we will add love to this world in your name until that beautiful day.

You gave us a purpose that we could have never discovered on our own. You helped us turn ash to gold.

I’m so proud that two beautiful boys as magnificent as you were created from my body and in my likeness. You existed, and that means I can be better.

Please keep holding my hand through these years, and protect your Daddy & sister.

I’ll keep sending my love letters to heaven…

Love,

Mommy